The mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be kindled - Plutarch

I'm losing my soccer fan hypersensitivity.

Don't get me wrong, it's still there. I still lose patience with ignorant putzes like the Daily Herald's Mike Imrem. It's not like it was, though... not even close.

What changed me? What caused my change of heart? Two things:

1. Most of you.
2. Mike Imrem, himself.

Mr. Imrem wrote a column about how ridiculous it was that he received a copy of the MLS Media Guide. Without realizing that he was not, in fact, in Don Garber's PDA address list under "Important Sports Writer," Imrem complained about all things soccer.

Now, this is where the second catalyst in my attitude adjustment comes in. I watched the horror and disgust as soccer fan after soccer fan posted on bigsoccer.com what they had written in response to Imrem's column.

"You are so ignorant!" they howled. "You don't know nothing about soccer, your not even a good righter!"

I admit it. Aside from the double negative, the comma splice, and the spelling errors, I was one of you! I don't remember what I called him, but it wasn't pretty. Last year, a hundred soccer fans from around the country wrote him. DC United fans, Burn fans, and Galaxy fans all joined together for the sole purpose of ripping him "a new one."

This year, he wrote a very similar column after receiving another media guide. No, Mike, they still don't know who you are. He even acknowledged the fact that he received a plethora of hate mail from soccer advocates. Fans wrote him again this time. One fan wanted to know "why the Daily Herald would solicit such trite." Another hoped that this "wasn't the calibur of of soccer bashing we should expect from the American sports media in the future."

Is this the caliber of soccer basher bashing we can expect from fans in the future? I hope not. In any case, I wrote him too. This time, however, I thought I'd be more personally productive. I asked him if, since he resented receiving it, I could have his media guide.

He replied, "sorry, i'm saving it a souvenir. it is one of the better league guides i receive."

So, finally, I get it. In response to one person's lamentation, Imrem wrote, "you blew my cover with 'rhetorical narcissistic self gratification. that was my motive precisely.'" He was telling the truth.

Soccer lovers are fun to mess with. We're so sensitive. We must be the whiniest, easily manipulated bunch of pansies in the world of sports, and I plan to continue my ascension to a nice, warm place above all that.

It's become worse since the Fire have begun their MLS campaign in west-suburban Naperville, IL.

"The pitch isn't real grass."
"There are football lines on the field!"
"It looks minor league!"

To this, I respond: The fake grass is green. There are goals on each end. There are 22 talented players on the field trying to help their team put the ball in the opposing net.

Does it really need to be better?

So the next time some putz degrades our beloved sport, move on. Don't give him (or her) the satisfaction or the traffic.

What if someone gave a soccer bash and nobody came?